I think I'm the last person alive to discover Mitch Hedberg, a comedian who died in 2005, but I'm making up for lost time, now. I was interested in what looks like a tremor and looked for more information about him. It would appear that he had severe stage fright and often wore sunglasses and/or closed his eyes during his performances to avoid making eye contact with the audience. What an anxiety superhero! To do something that freaks you out that intensely is amazing. I wonder, did he purposefully push himself to go beyond his comfort level, or was the thought of not getting out there even worse than getting out there?
This weekend I'm doing something that nearly petrifies me, and I'm not sure whether I'm doing it because pushing myself is good for me, or because not doing it would be unbearable. Either way, I'll be out there, in front of the (eep!) camera as my friend Adam produces a short film from start to finish. At this moment, he is finding out his genre and the particular character, line, and prop he must use. I'll join the creative team in a few minutes as they hash out ideas before feverishly writing the script tonight (I'll be heading home to sleep). Tomorrow as early as 6:30am we'll be convening to start shooting, and by Sunday evening our film will be done! Next weekend Dan and I are hoping to go for at least our group's screening. Cross your fingers that I don't totally end up on the cutting room floor. Or should I hope for that?
Does it scare me more to do it, or not to do it? Maybe for lunch I'll have a club sandwich in Mitch's honor. Here's to doing what scares us, for whatever reason. And I'm definitely for frilly toothpicks.